Meet Coach Kiah
Hey there friends! I am so excited to have you tune in to my very own podcast, which still feels WILD to say. I’ve been dreaming of this podcast for a couple of years and I’m so excited to finally have it out into the world. So, before we dive in, THANK YOU for being here and listening. It truly means the world to me!
SO… WHO IS COACH KIAH?
I’d venture to guess that you likely found me because of my weight loss story. I lost 100+ pounds and my story has been shared in the media all over the world including People Magazine, Good Morning America, the Kelly Clarkson Show, and more.
But, there’s much more to the story.
GROWING UP IN DIET CULTURE
I grew up in very rural California on my family’s now seven-generation cattle ranch located on the outskirts of San Luis Obispo County, an hour from the nearest grocery store, gas station, or high school.
Starting at a very young age, I struggled with my weight and body image, feeling shame about my body as soon as I was old enough to even recognize I had one. I knew my body didn’t look like the barbies I was playing with, I didn't fit into the same clothes as my cousins and friends did, and it was difficult for me to keep up with the other kids on the playground.
Looking back at old photos, it breaks my heart to know that version of me, a young innocent child, already had so many insecurities about her body. I wasn’t much older than my oldest niece is now and it kills me to think that soon she could start feeling shame about her body too.
I had a wonderful childhood surrounded by my deeply loving and supportive family. As I gained weight, they worried about me and my health. To encourage healthier habits, my parents went on the low-carb Atkins diet with me when I was 10 so we would all lose weight together.
While on our diet, I vividly remember desperately missing fruit, which was mostly off-limits due to the high sugar content. I would crave the Frito Flavor Blast Twists my cousin packed in her school lunch, yearning for the satisfying crunch but knowing they weren’t allowed because they were rich in carbs.
While the goal of the diet was to teach me to eat healthy foods and lose weight, all it did was teach me to attach morality to food, labeling some as “good” foods and others as “bad” foods. My relationship with food, which had always been my comfort, became even more complicated and disordered. When my grandma babysat me, I’d hide in her back pantry binge eating potato chips because I was ashamed, my scarcity mindset around food made me think I’d never get to eat them again.
Looking back, I know deep down the comments my friends and family made about my body and my food choices came from a loving place. Although their impacts may have at times been harmful, I’m compassionate towards the fact that they themselves were victims of diet culture too.
I continued to struggle with my weight through elementary school, high school, college, and my early twenties, but it’s not to say that I didn’t try. Unfortunately, all the diets I tried (which were most of them) failed me. They would all start out strong, sometimes I’d even lose some weight, but only to end up gaining it all back and then some. Each diet left me feeling more hopeless and defeated than the last.
What was the point?
I was afraid I was going to die alone. Who could love me like this? I couldn’t even love myself.
GIVE ME 10 MINUTES A DAY FOR 5 DAYS TO KICKSTART YOUR HEALTH JOURNEY FOR FREE!
BREAKING FREE
I struggled for a long time with my body, telling myself hateful things when I looked in the mirror, things I would never say to anyone else. I would get to a place where I felt so disgusted with myself that I’d finally feel motivated enough by self-shame that I’d try again to lose weight. Then, after starting a new restrictive diet in the hopes it might finally be the one that worked, I’d eventually mess up. And when I didn’t show up perfectly, I’d shame myself for being a failure, comfort myself in food, and the cycle would continue.
It became an endless cycle of self-shame yo-yo dieting. Have a body, hate my body, try to fix it with a diet, do so imperfectly, shame myself for failing, console myself with food, and repeat.
I’ve learned to be compassionate about my behavior due to the culture that I, my family, and likely you, grew up in. A society that conditioned us to believe that our bodies are problems to be solved. We were sold the lie that happiness, joy, and freedom were all on the other side of looking a certain way, on the other side of weight loss.
Instead of being critical of myself or my family, I recognize that we were all at grips with diet culture, doing the best with what we knew. This journey for me has been about learning how to know better, do better, and let this legacy of diet culture and self-shame yo-yo dieting end with me.
WHEN THINGS CHANGED
After high school, I went away for college, moved to Germany for a year, and then started my first “big kid” job at the Kentucky Beef Council advocating on behalf of Kentucky’s 38,000 cattle farmers.
One of the programs I was in charge of in that position was the nutrition program, sharing beef’s role in a healthy diet and lifestyle. While I knew the research and information I was sharing was true, I felt hypocritical because I wasn’t walking the talk when it came to healthy nutrition and overall lifestyle. I questioned if I was doing more of a disservice to the beef industry I grew up in than I was actually helping it.
My shame in that role wasn’t enough for me to change things, that moment came in August 2018.
I was leaving from Kentucky to Arizona for a work trip, excited to travel but anxiety-ridden knowing airplane seats weren’t made for people in larger bodies like me. After getting on the airplane, squeezing into the seat, and fumbling with the seatbelt, the flight attendant offered me a seatbelt extender.
The only thing I could do to not burst into tears out of embarrassment was to shove my face into the book that I just happened to have bought at the airport bookstore, Rachel Hollis’ book Girl, Wash Your Face.
Her message of ownership was what really hit me, like a loving slap in the face to wake up. It was the first time I realized how much I had been playing the victim in my life in a really big way. I blamed my genetics, my job, my partner, and everything else outside of me for why I felt unhappy, unhealthy, and unfulfilled in my life. I was giving all my power away instead of taking ownership of my own choices.
It was the message I needed to hear at a time when I was finally ready to receive it.
If it was MY choices that got me here, then it gets to be MY choices that get me somewhere else. It was the most freeing realization, one that allowed me to finally put myself in the driver's seat of my life.
After reading her book, I decided to try the Last 90 Days Challenge starting on October 1, 2018. For the last quarter of the year, I committed to doing five simple habits as part of what Hollis calls her Five to Thrive.
Wake up one hour early for myself
Drink half my body weight in ounces of water
Write down 10 things I’m grateful for
Give up one food that doesn’t bless my body
Move for 30 minutes each day
On day one, I took photos of myself to commemorate another new beginning and weighed myself in at 285 pounds before starting my first of many free YouTube dance workouts in my living room.
By the end of the Last 90 Days, I had lost 25 pounds and for the first time I didn’t feel like I was creating empty promises to myself come January 1st.
By showing up and honoring my promises, I had built self-confidence in myself that I had never felt before. I learned to speak to myself better and feel grateful for where I was at.
For a long time, I thought everything I wanted was on the other side of weight loss. But what I really wanted was freedom, joy, and energy to chase my dreams and play with my nieces. I hadn’t ever considered that all those things were already available to me. Happiness isn’t dependent on how much you weigh or what you look like, it’s an inside job.
FAST FORWARD
In one year I lost 103 pounds, sharing about my health journey on my social media every step of the way. Friends and family started asking questions, wanting to know how I did it so they could do it for themselves too.
After being asked regularly if I offered coaching, I decided to give it a try and fell in love with supporting others that were walking the same journey that I did. Thanks to an incredible opportunity to have my story featured in People Magazine, Good Morning America, Access Hollywood, and more, my business expanded in ways I never thought possible.
While I wouldn’t wish my struggles on anyone else, I believe deep in my core now that my struggle with weight and body image was one of the greatest blessings of my life. I was able to turn my struggles into strength and I now have the incredible opportunity to help thousands of others walking that same journey too.
I am on a mission to help others break free from diet culture and self-shame to rebuild their relationship with themselves from the inside out while learning to love themselves again. I don’t have all the answers, but I’m committed to continuing to learn and grow alongside my community.
My hope is for this podcast to be a place for us to share our common humanity, to connect, learn, share, and grow together, all while holding space for the hard stuff too.
Thank you for being here, I look forward to climbing with you!
Make sure to hit subscribe so you don’t miss out on future episodes. If you like what you heard, take a moment to leave a 5 star review!
Let’s hang out on social media and keep the conversation going!
Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coach_kiah
Connect with me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/coachkiah